Busy Days

January has gone by in a complete blur. I've been working more because we are a bit short at work, so that's been part of it. It's getting more and more exhausting already for me to work a lot of hours - it looks like I may get pulled out on maternity leave as early as March or as late as mid-April, but not the May 1st that I was hoping to get to. The other bummer was that at my last doctor's appointment they nixed my travel plans for Spring Break. I was hoping to take Thomas to Florida and then take some time for Emmett and I to do a little trip the two of us to the islands or something like that, but that's a no go. My ob said no more travel after March 15th - although it is unclear (meaning I didn't think to ask specifically) what exactly that means - no airline travel? no travel at all? no travel outside a certain radius? The concern, which is extremely valid, is that preterm labor is a big possibility from now on and if something happens and these babies are born very prematurely, it would be awful to have them somewhere far from home in a strange hospital and them having to stay in that hospital in the NICU for 4-6 weeks. So my guess is that if I travel it has to pretty much be where I could get back to San Francisco if I needed to in an emergency - ummm, how far is that? I guess we could probably go to Oakland or San Jose, but I guess that's about as exotic as our travel is going to get for a while - haha. Not sure about Monterey, but hopefully that would be okay because I know Emmett's Mom is going to want us to come down at some point between now and when the babies are born. Ahhh well, it will all be worth it if these little ones are born healthy - that's all that really matters.

My Mom was in town for a week last week. It was so wonderful having her here, we had a really good time, in spite of the fact that I developed a nasty cold the day before she came which I can only hope and pray she doesn't get and pass on to the grandmas. We spent three nights in a hotel - our special treat. Thomas loved it, of course. The hotel had a wonderfully warm swimming pool that was really shallow so Thomas loved that and so did I! It was the warmest hotel pool I've ever been in, incredible! I swear it was about 95 degrees! We were joking that it was like the largest hot tub ever - except that it was just cool enough for me to be safe with the babies - perfect! We had room service, although our room was missing it's room service menu and it ended up being more difficult than it should have been to get a replacement so we could actually see what there was available to order. We did eventually get it figured out and had some yummy desserts one night and an amazingly good meal on another night. Yum, yum!!
On Friday night we went to the Body Worlds exhibit in San Jose, Emmett and my Mom and I. It was fantastic, we all really enjoyed it. I was actually surprised by how much Emmett got into it - I think he was even more into it than my Mom and I - the "medical people". Anyway, it was fun, very intense, we ended up being there for about 2 1/2 hours just looking at the exhibits and reading all the information. Mom and I particularly loved the pathophysiology.


Speaking of food, I'm up about 5 pounds so far with this pregnancy, which I think is a good thing. I'm pretty happy about it and was relieved that my ob/gyn also thought this was fine. I was so overweight to begin with that she doesn't mind if I keep my weight gain to a minimum, and so far this is not a problem. It would be great to get through this pregnancy and end up lighter than when I started - it would also give me a good start on getting some weight off after the babies come - YMCA here I come!!! Speaking of which, I haven't been as good lately about my work outs, need to get back with the program quick before I get out of the routine completely. However, I may have to rework what I am doing at this point - I'm getting huge! My ob said at my last appointment that my abdomen measures what would be normal at around 7.5 or 8 months for a single pregnancy. Wow! That's laying down, so it doesn't measure fat, either haha.

This last ob/gyn appointment was all about the "reality check". She really wants me to get on the ball about getting into the birthing refresher course, a parenting class for multiples, a hospital tour, all of that. I guess it's probably time for all that, but it's just going by so fast.

Today was the "fetal survey" ultrasound. It's a 90 minute appointment (that ended up being more like 2 hours) so you can imagine my surprise when I went to drop Thomas off at school and discovered there was no school today and so he had to come with me for the whole thing. He did pretty darn well for the active 5 year old that he is having to stay still and occupy himself for the whole thing. He got a little bit more difficult at the end, but overall I was really impressed with how good he was. And the good news was that everything is within normal on both babies. They are about a pound each and almost exactly the size they should be. I am so relieved and happy. Everything is chromosomally healthy and looking good developmentally as well. Yipee!! Now if we can just keep them safe and sound for another 15-16 weeks in utero, and have a safe vaginal delivery, all will be well! Is that too much to ask? I hope not...

Anyhow, better run, I promised to take Thomas to see the Alvin and Chipmunks movie so we better get on the road. I added a few more baby pics. I'll be having another ultrasound in 4 weeks, so more pics then.

Love,
Melissa

Today's testing

Well, it was all good news today...both babies look healthy and normal and are growing well. And...we found out today that baby "A" is a boy, so there is one girl and one boy. This is kind of what we were hoping for (it's so not PC to state a preference these days, but I have to be honest that I was hoping for a boy), so we are happy. Not too many good pics today of the babies, but we're having the "fetal survey" ultrasound done in 3 weeks (at 21 weeks rather than the usual 20 weeks) and so hopefully more photos then. However, we got a couple of photos today and a couple of (what I think at least) are funny photos that were the shots used to confirm the sex of each baby. Here they are:

Happy New Year

It's hard to believe another year has come and gone...2007 really had some great highlights for our family. It would be easy to call it one of my personal greatest years - college graduation after some 18 years of trying, finally conceiving not one, but two siblings for Thomas (after more than a year of trying), and, most recently, becoming a finalist in the application process for my master's degree at UCSF, a shocking and wonderful bit of news that came to me on Christmas Eve. Not sure what I'll do about it yet, but more time to ponder that later. On the family side, Thomas started his Spanish immersion kindergarten and loves it, and we had a "Summer of Fun" that was really one to remember, especially our wonderful trip to Michigan that far exceeded all of our expectations, although we also had so how much fun camping and going to Santa Cruz beach boardwalk...oh yes, and Thomas's pirate party that was such a success.

But losing Blake will keep 2007 from ever being a truly great year - it casts a shadow over everything else. It's a loss that my conscious mind won't allow me to fully absorb, only in small bits and pieces, but at night I often dream of him and they are sad, emotionally draining dreams that remind me of how terrible this loss truly is and how my life is forever changed by losing my cousin and one of the very best friends I've ever had. I miss him so much already.

2008 is off to a good start...today Emmett received a clean bill of health from his doctor, so we can relax about that - good cholesterol, reasonable blood pressure, all systems go. He seemed healthy, but it's always a great relief, especially with two babies on the way, to know that your partner, best friend and lover is strong and healthy. :-)

Happy New Year to all and may 2008 bring peace, love, and happiness

Love,
Melissa

Memories of the past...and the friends who have left us

It's hard to believe that another year has come and gone. 2007 was such a huge year here in the Nolan household, both in great ways and yes, also in some bad ways.

I had a dream a couple of nights ago about Blake - again. Although it has been several months since his death, it is still so hard for me to accept the truth of it and the finality of it. I find myself going over and over our conversations over the last year and wishing I had been able to read him better...things he said that perhaps should have clued me in to how bad he was feeling - but then I just didn't have a frame of reference, no context in which to put his comments. That this could happen never occurred to me as a possibility, so there was never any way for me to make the leap from what he was saying to what was really going on in his mind. I think in some ways he wanted to reach out to me, but I was so far away and so busy with my own life and I don't think that he was willing to really put it out there the way that he was feeling. I tried many times to convince him to come for a visit, but there never seemed to be time or money to make that happen. Nothing can change what happened and I know that I can't take the blame for Blake's decisions, but it continues to be so hard to accept.

...oops out of time, guess I'll have to finish the trip down memory lane another time